Take a lesson from the mosquito. She never waits for an opening - she makes one.

- Kirk Kirkpatrick

Anyone who thinks Christmas doesn't last all year just doesn't have a Mastercard.

- Kirk Kirkpatrick

If at first you don't succeed, take the tax loss.

- Kirk Kirkpatrick

If at first you don't succeed, try management. Indecision is the key to flexibility. If at first you don't succeed, take the tax loss.

- Kirk Kirkpatrick

If the Lord had meant us to pay income taxes, he'd have made us smart enough to prepare the return.

- Kirk Kirkpatrick