I like to be the one in charge of everything.

- Amy Sedaris

There's humor in everything. There's gotta be humor in everything.

- Amy Sedaris

Before you can give of yourself to others you must know what of yourself you have to give. Every person is special. In all the land there is only one…

- Amy Sedaris

Accentuaute the positives - medicate the negatives.

- Amy Sedaris

Most people think witches are a coven of lesbians dancing naked in the forest celebrating the semen stolen from imprisoned hypnotized males, which th…

- Amy Sedaris

The moment someone says, 'Hey, everyone, listen to the words in this song,' your party is over.

- Amy Sedaris

I cried when I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. And then I laughed REALLY hard.

- Amy Sedaris

If you see a shy person, ask them some questions like, 'Why are you so shy? Tell everyone, we're all listening.

- Amy Sedaris

I think it's good for a person to spend time alone. It gives them an opportunity to discover who they are and to figure out why they are always alone.

- Amy Sedaris