Never trust a woman whose father calls her 'Princess'. Chances are she believes it.

- Wes Smith

Seek but provision of bread and wine, fools to flatter, and clothing fine; and nothing of God shall ever be thine.

- Wes Smith

A $20 haircut hardly ever lasts longer than a $5 haircut.

- Wes Smith

There is nothing personal about a personal ad.

- Wes Smith

The chief beneficiary of life insurance policies for young, single people is the life insurance agent.

- Wes Smith

There is no such thing as a self-cleaning oven.

- Wes Smith

Hurry up and learn patience.

- Wes Smith

If you have to learn it from a self-help book, you may be beyond help.

- Wes Smith

Always take an extra quarter to the laundry room.

- Wes Smith