Advertising: the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.

- Stephen Leacock

There are two things in ordinary conversation which ordinary people dislike - information and wit

- Stephen Leacock

How strange it is, our little procession of life! The child says, "When I am a big boy." But what is that? The big boy says, "When I grow up." And th…

- Stephen Leacock

Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.

- Stephen Leacock

Success is 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration.

- Stephen Leacock

Writing is not hard. Just get paper and pencil, sit down, and write as it occurs to you. The writing is easy-it's the occurring that's hard.

- Stephen Leacock

Now, the essence, the very spirit of Christmas is that we first make believe a thing is so, and lo, it presently turns out to be so.

- Stephen Leacock

I am a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.

- Stephen Leacock

Being a specialist is one thing, getting a job is another.

- Stephen Leacock