People think I write fantasy, but I don't; some things may be exaggerated or distorted in the same way that painters distort and alter things, but th…

- Joe Orton

The Oscar Wilde of Welfare State gentility.

- Joe Orton

Policemen, like red squirrels, must be protected.

- Joe Orton

The humble and meek are thirsting for lood

- Joe Orton

Civilizations have been founded and maintained on theories which refused to obey facts.

- Joe Orton

I'd the upbringing a nun would envy. Until I was fifteen I was more familiar with Africa than my own body.

- Joe Orton

Every luxury was lavished on you - atheism, breastfeeding, circumcision.

- Joe Orton

FAY: The British police force used to be run by men of integrity. TRUSCOTT: That is a mistake which has been rectified.

- Joe Orton

God is a gentleman. He prefers blondes

- Joe Orton