I don't know why women are so mad about flowers. Personally, they leave me cold. I prefer trees.

- Sue Townsend

I've always loved books. I'm passionate about them. I think books are sexy. They are smooth and solid and contain delightful surprises. They smell go…

- Sue Townsend

I think it's essential for comic writers to have a hate figure, a despot, a regime to react against, and I think Thatcher was perfect for me, I loath…

- Sue Townsend

8.45 a.m. My mother is in the hospital grounds smoking a cigarette. She is looking old and haggard. All the debauchery is catching up with her.

- Sue Townsend

Yes, I hate it when people call me a 'national treasure'. It takes away your bite and makes you feel like a harmless old golden Labrador.

- Sue Townsend

I am from the working class. I am now what I was then. No amount of balsamic vinegar and Prada handbags could make me forget what it was like to be p…

- Sue Townsend

I'm spectacularly disorganised. I wrote my latest book in seven different notebooks scattered throughout my house.

- Sue Townsend

Every time I start a new piece of work, I spend a long while under the duvet thinking I can't do it.

- Sue Townsend

Most social problems could be helped or prevented if people had more money and practical advice.

- Sue Townsend