You've got to be careful smoking weed. It causes memory loss. And also, it causes memory loss.
Yesterday was Chinese New Year. It's the Year of the Rabbit. And here's how dumb I am. I'm still writing the Year of the Pig on my checks. - David Letterman
Yesterday was Chinese New Year. It's the Year of the Rabbit. And here's how dumb I am. I'm still writing the Year of the Pig on my checks.
- David Letterman
You'll never catch a nudist with his pants down. - David Letterman
You'll never catch a nudist with his pants down.
Obesity is now a problem in the navy. They've created a new rank: Really Big Rear Admiral. - David Letterman
Obesity is now a problem in the navy. They've created a new rank: Really Big Rear Admiral.
The Japanese Prime Minister has apologized for Japan's part in World War II. However, he still hasn't mentioned anything about karaoke. - David Letterman
The Japanese Prime Minister has apologized for Japan's part in World War II. However, he still hasn't mentioned anything about karaoke.
Somebody threw a book at President Obama. If you're trying to scare a president by throwing a book at him, you're one president too late. - David Letterman
Somebody threw a book at President Obama. If you're trying to scare a president by throwing a book at him, you're one president too late.
There just isn't enough televised Chess - David Letterman
There just isn't enough televised Chess
Unusual weather for New York City. Today it was 68 and foggy. No, wait a minute, that's me. I'm sorry, that's me. - David Letterman
Unusual weather for New York City. Today it was 68 and foggy. No, wait a minute, that's me. I'm sorry, that's me.
I feel like Bush presidencies are like "Godfather" films. You should stop at two. - David Letterman
I feel like Bush presidencies are like "Godfather" films. You should stop at two.
Everyday is a compromise. - David Letterman
Everyday is a compromise.
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