If you lose count of how many cookies you ate, the calorie intake ceases to exist. True story..
After you eat Grandma's cookies, everything in life gets better..
It’s like he has this power over me—like I have an eating disorder and he’s a package of Oreo Double Stuff cookies..
If there is no happy ending. Make one out of cookie dough..
It was a cookie, not a crack pipe..
Valentine's Day is a sham created by card companies to reinforce gender stereotypes. [..] I'll buy some cookies, but NOT for Valentine's Day. These c….
Ads are baked into content like chocolate chips into a cookie. Except, it’s actually more like raisins into a cookie - because nobody f---ing wants….
Mmmmm. Warm chocolate chip cookies. Not even AB negative can compare..
People always starve themselves, and then they get hungry, and then they eat the wrong things, like chips or cookies or whatever they can grab..
College is the grinding machine of the Mathematical Establishment, a conveyor belt that takes individuals from one cookie cutter to another so that t….
I try a different cookie recipe every time I bake..
I like Sultana cookies - they are so, so, so good. I think the best in the world..
Hey, ah, does anyone want a cookie or something? Oh yeah. A cookie. That would make everything better. Dunked in a shot of tequila , maybe? Or better….
I don't believe that everybody is out of some kind of cookie cutter, so the thing that protects me is always being level with myself, even to myself..
The cookie maker needs someone to look out for him..
Everything is exactly as it is for a reason. The crumb on your table is no mystical reminder of this morning's cookie, it is there because you have c….
Divorce doesn't fit my cookie-cutter image..
I can make cookies and do easy stuff. Pies are very specific and hard to do well though..
People want national championship banners. People want to talk about Indiana being competitive. How do we get there? We don't get there with milk and….
Once I opened up a fortune cookie and inside was the guy's cheque next to me I said hey buddy I got your cheque he said thanks..
I can't convince you to put the drink down if you're an alcoholic, you have to want to do that. I can't convince you to stop eating the cookies when ….