I know now for a fact that improv can't hold a candle to doing standup. It's not the same buzz, it just isn't. It feels infantile to me at times. Whe….

I take a lot of pitches. Some guys hate to do that..

The doc told me I had a dual personality. Then he lays an 82 dollar bill on me, so I give him 41 bucks and say, 'Get the other 41 bucks from the othe….

Defensive backs are the best players on the field. But when you get an exceptional player like a Deion Sanders or a Darrell Green - these guys are fa….

I'm attracted to a lot of hot guys. If Chris Hemsworth were here, I'd light him up like a firecracker with how fast I'd jump on him..

Any guy in his right mind would die to play Batman..

I've always wanted to be a guy with a rec room..

I'm not a win at all costs guy. Winning isn't everything. It's second to breathing..

Who besides guys like me are part of the reality-based community?.

I'm an affluent screenwriter and all that - I'm a known screenwriter, but I'm not in the fraternity of the very, very major people. I would say a guy….

My perspective is hard because I look at wardrobe from very much a guy's perspective. You look at my closet and I have pairs of black jeans and five ….

Nothing can be preserved that is not good..

As a kid I didn't root for the bad guys..

My "me" is God nor do I recognize any other "me" except my God himself..

Don't talk to us like we ignint!.

I like L.A., but I shouldn't live there..

I don't belong to anyone..

I'm no longer interested in the possible..

I just keep making things, and whatever happens, happens..

I've never been super confident about anything. The work is never as good as it could be..

One's life has many compartments..