I'm like everybody else..

Each time is true, but the truths are not the same..

And isn't it better really to leave things only hinted at?.

You take what you can get, I reckon. You take what you can get..

I'm so not a celebrity..

May the IRS find that you deduct your pet sheep as an entertainment expense..

I don't have to stop you. All I have to do is slow you down." -Ganner Rhysode.

I was going to start off tonight with an Obama joke but I don't want to get audited by the IRS..

Russia is not our friend..

Better to be the failure who nobly strived than the success who never really had to..

The future's here, we are it, we are on our own.

I don't really take myself very seriously..

The Fuhrer is always right. I sense it..

Gloriously false. [Like Rahab.].

I'm actually more confident when I'm tan..

I never said to myself, "I'm going to be the greatest." I just wanted to do my own thing..

The less it is possible that something can be, the more it must be..

Most people don't know this, but if you settle a debt for less than the amount you owed, you are potentially responsible for taxes on the forgiven de….

I'm happy to be where I am and how everything has turned out..

I'm not just anybody.' 'No, indeed. Nobody is..

You flatter me shamelessly. I like it. Good..