Comedy is a meritocracy. If you are funny, you are there. If you are not, you are out..

God hides things by putting them near us..

David Wong is like a mash-up of Douglas Adams and Stephen King . . . ‘page-turner’ is an understatement..

Success has less to do with what we can get ourselves to do and more to do with keeping ourselves from doing what we shouldn’t..

I don't buy stocks, I make stocks..

I was the first person Donald Trump threatened to sue on Twitter..

Death hastens those who hasten death..

Nothing is proved, all is permitted..

It's cool that you found somebody that you trust..

I recreate myself; that is my only power..

A good poem about failure is a success..

Can'ttrustpeople. Won'tdoanygood. They'llkillyoueverytime. They'llkilleachother. They'llkilleveryone..

I've never been a good hitter..

Be the most you can be, so life will be more because you were..

Presents, I often say, endear absents..

It's a very American thing to hide away from death..

The patience is in the living. Time opens out to you..

Sales fixes everything..

I worked with Cecil B DeMille quite a few times..

I fought for peace in the fifties..

I do what I have to do," I say. I do what I have to do to save him. I do what I have to do to save Todd..