before speaking, notice what motivates your words..

I do date quite frequently..

We are only what we do, not what we say we are..

You can never learn anything that is not a part of yourself..

The faith that I love the best, says God, is hope..

Improv is mostly what I've studied..

The love of power excludes all others..

Stand-up is something I just truly love to do, so I'll always go back to it. I'll never stop doing it, that's for sure..

I like what I like, I don't like what I don't like, and I'm very bad at toning myself down..

Let science tell us what and how. Let religion tell us who and why..

Everybody sings from their diaphragm..

Upward, not Northward.

I've never been competitive with anybody but myself..

I don't keep up with the Joneses, I am the Joneses..

All money is essentially merchandize..

I cannot live with someone who can't live without me..

I had rather be guillotined than a guillotiner..

There is, quite literally, nothing to understand..

As I came to power peacefully, so shall I keep it..

Don’t be against things so much as for things..

It's cool that you found somebody that you trust..