Quotes on Old Jokes

An old joke has an Oxford professor meeting an American former graduate student and asking him what he's working on these days. 'My thesis is on the survival of the class system in the United States.' 'Oh really, that's interesting: one didn't think there was a class system in the United States.' 'Nobody does. That's how it survives.

It was a somber place, haunted by old jokes and lost laughter. Life, as I discovered, holds no more wretched occupation than trying to make the English laugh.

Death's an old joke, but each individual encounters it anew.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

All diseases run into one, old age.

There's an old joke - um... two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of 'em says, "Boy, the food at this place is really terrible." The other one says, "Yeah, I know; and such small portions." Well, that's essentially how I feel about life - full of loneliness, and misery, and suffering, and unhappiness, and it's all over much too quickly.

Is anything wrong, dear? the old joke went. No, why? You moved. Just don't move.

Forty is the old age of youth; fifty the youth of old age.

Everyone has a photographic Memory, some just don't have film.