Women, stop buying the lingerie. Stop buying it right now. Oh, it's a big rip off. Oh my god, $18 bucks for panties this big? Come on, one trip throu….

I'm not afraid of putting myself out there to someone and then them passing on it. At least you could have gotten a 'yes.' So it's worthwhile to have….

There were very few women comics when I started out doing stand-up. But I always saw that as a great advantage..

Animal experiments are no joke. Thank goodness scientists are finding better, more humane ways to develop treatments for cancer and other killer dise….

They're all sources of material. What I love about what I do, the more you talk about your life, there are so many people who have similar experience….

I suddenly had this really mad desire to have an affair with a woman. I was divorced. I was childless. I figured there's got to be one more way to re….

I don't exercise. My philosophy is: No pain, no pain..

The only thing I said to my parents when I was a teenager was Hang up, I got it!.

Just be your authentic self because there's nothing sexier or more beautiful than that..

My father was a really funny guy. He lived a good long life. And he was the reason I wanted to be funny and become a comedian and a comedy writer, so….

I'm always a big fan of if you approach somebody politely about something and you're not a nudge - you're just pretty honest and simple, my kind of p….

I think what I would say to my younger self, and probably to younger, just starting-out writers is that a lot of times you're just afraid to put your….

Growing up, it was always, 'If you buy kosher meat, they're killed humanely.' But I've seen so many horrible videos. What we thought was humane 100 y….

I always say to women, 'Take advantage of the fact that you're in the minority, don't see it as a disadvantage. You're that much more unique when the….

Been thinking about having a baby. But if I want to do it, I'd have to do it soon 'cause it's getting near closing time. The clock is ticking. My gyn….

Long Island - if you're from out of town, how would I describe it? Well, every girl in my neighborhood looked like Kenny G..

Like a lot of women, I'm bisexual. Once I have sex with you - bye!.

My kind of gay is like the late-breaking-lesbian kind of gay..

I cried when I turned 34 for no other reason than 34 sounded old to me at the time..

Sex when you're married is like going to the 7-Eleven: There's not much variety, but at three in the morning, it's always there..

It was a mixed marriage. I'm human, and he was a Klingon..