Explore Quotes by Carrot Top

I always think everyone else is funnier than me. I look at other comedians and I say, 'I wish I was that good.' People think I'm funny, and I say, 'I'm not.'

I've experienced plenty of times when something I think is funny doesn't do very well. And there are times when something I don't think is funny makes the audience laugh so hard.

I would like to be someone like Steve Martin. That's the path I'd like to follow.

I've always believed that it's important to give something back to the world and community.

I do go through a mini depression because one minute there are people yelling and screaming for me on stage and the next I'm at home and it's dead quiet. So it takes a while to come down.

I have a home in Orlando. That's kind of my default 'getaway' city.

I think it's important for me, for my crew and for the audience to bring something new to each show. I have friends who have done the same act, word for word for word, for 20 years. I have a problem with that. I think the audience should see something new in each show.

My real name is Scott Thompson. I could have gone by that name, but when I started doing comedy I thought I needed to go by something that has a little more of a hook.

I never looked at Gallagher like he was a threat to me.

Comics don't like to see other comics do well.

I think the more you do this and the more comfortable you become on stage, you start speaking more and becoming more of a character in yourself.

There's nothing wrong with trying to reach out to new fans.

I have to go out for lunch and dinner because I can't cook. I need a woman to come and save me from my cooking.

In movies, you don't get reactions: Live, when you do a joke, you know in a second whether it's good or bad. But in a movie, since no one is allowed to laugh or do anything, when you're done with a scene, you're left asking, 'Was that funny?'

I've always wanted to do a segment on a talk show. Jay Leno has been such a good friend, and if he would allow me, I'd have to get it all together, but I'd like to go on 'The Tonight Show' and do a set with no props. Or come out with a trunk and never touch it. Or come out with a clear trunk with nothing in it.

The blessing is that everyone knows who I am because of the commercials.

Like I told Howard, I can't help it that I'm beautiful.

I've got the long hair and kind of androgynous look. It's love-hate; it's sexy, but not sexy. So it's either you get it or you don't.

People always say to me, 'You're really attractive - in an unusual way.' No one ever just says, 'You're attractive.'

Some people don't realize that I've had a career pre-commercials.

Before I got addicted to comedy, I was seriously thinking about playing tennis full time. I joined the tennis team and played with a lot of professionals.