George Jean Nathan

The test of a real comedian is whether you laugh at him before he opens his mouth.

Beauty makes idiots sad and wise men merry.

It may be said that artist and censor differ in this wise: that the first is a decent mind in an indecent body and that the second is an indecent mind in a decent body.

Bad officials are the ones elected by good citizens who do not vote.

It is the mark of a superior person that, left to themselves they are able endlessly to amuse, interest and entertain themselves out of their personal stock of meditations, ideas, criticisms, memories, philosophy, humor and what not.

Politics is the diversion of trivial men who, when they succeed at it, become important in the eyes of more trivial men.

All that is necessary to raise imbecility into what the mob regards as profundity is to lift it off the floor and put it on a platform.