Explore Quotes by Jay Leno

The first lady said about her husband, 'I could take up a whole afternoon talking about his failures.' And today she was offered her own show on Fox News.

Really? Anyone intimidated by Barack Obama? He can't even keep Joe Biden in line.

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up.

Did you hear that we're writing Iraq's new Constitution?_x000D_Why not just give them ours? We're not using it anymore.

If I have one advantage, it's that I will try to work harder than the next guy.

These White House scandals are not going away anytime soon. People in Kenya are now saying he's 100 percent American. That's how bad it's gotten.

It's casual Friday, which means that at the White House, they're casually going through everybody's phone calls and records.

Fox News has changed its slogan from 'Fair and Balanced' to 'See, I told you so!'

The worst thing about losing this job: I’m no longer covered by NBC. I have to sign up for ObamaCare.

You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out.

When you fix something with your hands it gives you a sense of accomplishment and a sense of self worth.

Today, you get better performance from a Ford Focus than a Ferrari from the mid-70s. [The Focus] is just as fast and with better fuel economy. It's fun to see supercar technology trickle down to everyday cars.

Anybody who gives their car to a valet isn't a car guy

Show business is like Champagne. You'll appreciate it more if you don't drink it everyday

When you work with your hands, you learn to appreciate how easy it is to earn money talking.

If there isn't a parking space out front or I can't see my car from the window, we're eating somewhere else.

I believe engineers will save the world.

Regulations force people to do better.

I was born the day I got my license. When I was a kid, if I wanted to go somewhere and see things, you have to get in your car and actually go.

The car was the iPhone of the 20th century. Kids these days don't have to drive anymore. They just go there virtually.

Corporations complained about [safety] regulations, but let's face it, people walk away from accidents now that would have killed them when I was a kid