It's lovely being a parent and being in a strong marriage with somebody who is your best friend..

It can be tough as a jobbing actor..

I used to be good with kids, but as I get older, I'm grumpy and terrible with them. As for doing a gig at a 6-year old's birthday party, you couldn't….

I was loved as a kid; I was raised with more love and emotional support than most folks could wish for my memories aged nought to ten are all bound u….

I also want to return to doing stand-up. I've become frightened of live audiences. This is a really telling sign that I need to go back on the comedy….

The people on the QVC shopping channel convince me that life is worth living. They see the good in everything. People who go to counselling should ac….

I get obsessed with decorations and decorating the house. I keep it tasteful outside, but when you get inside it is a bit like Blackpool illumination….

I trained to be a priest - started to. I went to seminary school when I was 11. I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex….

I used to attract a lot of feeders. I'd be quite happy to be locked in someone's flat and fed liquidised burgers..

With stand-up you've just got that one chance. Audiences can be quite fickle..

You can sway an audience if you win the women over. The gentlemen will follow 'cause they can be so foolish like that at times, they are easily led..

It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether..

The idea of being on TV 24 hours a day and people seeing the real me... No..

Comedy's so subjective, and if someone comes to watch, doesn't get it, doesn't find it funny, then fine..

I think it sort of dawns on you that if you're not gigging constantly you're not actually relevant. You may be relevant to a different part of the me….

I've spent lots of time in London, I studied in London, I like London. It's just not my home..

If an original piece of wardrobe came up from Star Wars, I'd probably spend a lot of money on it..

I believe that Britain is becoming more class-conscious, and I quake at the very idea of Old Etonians ruling the world again..

Being 'Johnny' was almost like an out of body experience. I thought he was just a character that I'd created and could quite easily step away from, b….

I had a massive amount of self-belief when I did stand-up..

Up North you are holding your own. Everyone considers themselves a comedian..