It ain't what a man don't know that makes him a fool, but what he does know that ain't so..

Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go..

Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope..

The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust..

Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail..

When the truth is in your way, you are on the wrong road..

Some folks are wise and some otherwise..

The devil is the father of lies, but he neglected to patent the idea, and the business now suffers from competition..

There are two kinds of fools: those who can't change their opinions and those who won't..

Men who have much to say use the fewest words..

Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there..

Most people when they come to you for advice, come to have their own opinions strengthened, not corrected..

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself..

Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well..

Ignorance ain't not knowin' stuff; ignorance is knowin' stuff that AIN'T TRUE..

There are people so addicted to exaggeration that they actually can't tell the truth without lying..

The greatest thief this world has ever produced is procrastination, and he is still at large..

If you do not know how to lie, cheat, and steal, turn your attention to politics and learn..

As a general rule, if you want to get at the truth - hear both sides and believe neither..

Half of the troubles of this life can be traced to saying yes too quickly and not saying no soon enough..

Laughter is the fireworks of the soul..