My table seats eight, so that's my maximum. Having a small number of guests is the only way to generate good conversation. Besides, your whole house ….

Outsiders develop humor as a defense; why do you think most comedians are gay or Jewish?.

My dad was a ham, too. He could sell those women anything. Of all his sons, I was the only one he could trust to sell as well as he could. I was prou….

I can't even get three weeks off to have cosmetic surgery..

I have this beautiful antique silver wine decanter that I bought at an auction. I always pour wine from that..

My sisters said, Why do you make those faces? You make yourself so ugly..

I was obsessed with being rich and famous..

I feel now it's useless to keep hoping. The way things are today, we live in a world that needs laughter, and I've decided if I can make people laugh….

Peter Marshall: A western saddle has a curved horn on the front to hold something for the cowboy. What is it?.

I cant stand those food cult people who bring their own food into the house. All those little thermoses and paper bags-it makes the other guests unco….

Sandwiches are wonderful. You don't need a spoon or a plate!.

Learning lines is on my mind until I do know them. I'll read the paper or paint the house to keep from starting to memorize. I've never found an easy….

I don't always prepare such rich meals. Sometimes I'll just serve a simple quiche, salad and dessert for dinner. During the week I try to eat lightly..

My following is straight. I'm so glad..

I have an ulcer. It has an IQ of 185..

I'm Liberace without a piano..

I often go on a liquid fast a couple of days a week. I never take just water. Instead, I'll have maybe six glasses of vegetable and fruit juices a da….

I may find something that looks interesting and then go on to alter the recipe by adding spices, things of my own. I also look for time-saving recipe….

My father was adamant in his disapproval of my interest in show business..

I laughed all the way through Love Story..

It was the worst moment of my life. The producer came up and talked me back into going on stage..