Although practice swings Can be helpful things, Twere better, indeed, not take any Than to fiddle and fret And before playing get Exhausted from taki….

Beauty is only skin deep, and the world is full of thin skinned people..

Shake and shake the catsup bottle none will come and then a lot'll..

Middle age is the time of life that a man first notices in his wife..

That money talks, I'll not deny, I heard it once: It said, 'Goodbye'..

Of late I appear To have reached that stage When people who look old Who are only my age..

If you convinced me And I convinced you, Would there not still be Two points of view?.

If I ever make a hole in one, A thrill that I've never known, I won't be believed and I'll have no fun, For I'm sure to be playing alone..

[Beowolf] is considered an epic because of its long speeches, its digressions, its repetition, and its being required..

Each year it grows harder to make ends meet - the ends I refer to are hands and feet..

Until Eve arrived, this was a man's world..

Retired is being tired twice, I've thought, first tired of working, then tired of not..

Some people can carry a tune, but they seem to stagger under the load..

Adolescence isn't a period; it's a coma..

Politics, it seems to me, for years, or all too long, has been concerned with right or left instead of right or wrong..

Book burning is a charming old custom, hallowed by antiquity. It has been practiced for centuries by fascists, communists, atheists, school children,….

In larger things we are convivial; what causes trouble is the trivial..

This golfer has a wicked slice. And quite a follow-through. That's why his partner, who stood too close, Is on the green in two..

There is some consolation in the fact that, even though your dreams don't come true, neither do your nightmares..

If we cannot define stupidity, at least we can trace most human misfortunes and weaknesses to it. Its manifestations are legion, its symptoms are end….

I've suffered from all of the hang-ups known, and none is as bad as the telephone..