Occupation: Humorist Birth: September 15, 1889 Death: November 21, 1945
The free-lance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps..
When we think back to our forefathers, with their sedentary lives of forest-chopping, railroad-building, fortune-founding, their fox-hunting and Indi….
In a house where there are small children the bathroom soon takes on the appearance of the Old Curiosity Shop..
If there is a streak of ham anywhere in an actor, Shakespeare will bring it out..
If only those old walls could talk...how boring they would be..
Great literature must spring from an upheaval in the author's soul. If that upheaval is not present then it must come from the works of any other aut….
Who has not wished that his host would come out frankly at the beginning of the visit and state, in no uncertain terms, the rulesand preferences of t….
I have been told by hospital authorities that more copies of my works are left behind by departing patients than those of any other author..
I once heard of a murderer who propped his two victims up against a chess board in sporting attitudes and was able to get as far as Seattle before hi….
I never knew anyone yet who got up at six who did anything more useful between that time and breakfast than banging a tennis ballup against the side ….
A man gets on a train with his little boy, and gives the conductor only one ticket. 'How old's your kid?' the conductor says, and the father says, 'H….
It is rather to be chosen than great riches, unless I have omitted something from the quotation..
One of the chief duties of the fan is to engage in arguments with the man behind him. This department of the game has been allowed to run down fearfu….
You won't find one fish in a million that has enough sense to come in when it rains..
Streets flooded. Please advise..
But compared with the task of selecting a piece of French pastry held by an impatient waiter a move in chess is like reaching for a salary check in i….
Consider the number of young people all over the world who are getting married, day in and day out, for no other reason than thatsomeone of the oppos….
The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him..
The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him. That remark in itself wouldn’t make any sense if quoted as it stands. The average man ought….
The Great Arizona Desert is full of the bleaching bones of people who waited for me to start something..
The most common of all antagonisms arises from a man's taking a seat beside you on the train, a seat to which he is completely entitled..