For most visitors to Manhattan, both foreign and domestic, New York is the Shrine of the Good Time. "I don't see how you stand it," they often say to….

All that a spectator gets out of the game is fresh air, the comical articles in his program, the sight of twenty-two young men rushing about in myste….

If you think that you have caught a cold, call in a good doctor. Call in three good doctors and play bridge..

I can remember the day when all that a professor was supposed to do was to mark "C minus" on students' examination papers, then gohome to tea. Nowada….

There seems to be a common strain of miserliness in the American people when it comes to throwing away toothpaste tubes which havea little left in th….

Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did..

Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?.

Sheer madness is, of course, the highest possible brow in humor..

My only solution for the problem of habitual accidents is to stay in bed all day. Even then, there is always the chance that you will fall out..

What is the disease which manifests itself in an inability to leave a party--any party at all--until it is all over and the lightsare being put out?.….

There may be said to be two classes of people in the world; those who constantly divide the people of the world into two classes and those who do not..

Who said time machines haven't been built yet? They already exist. They're called books.

I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well..

It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous..

Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed be doing at that moment..

I once heard a woman laugh at that most tragic moment in all drama, the off-stage shot in "The Wild Duck," and I afterward had her killed, so there w….

The biggest obstacle to professional writing is the necessity for changing a typewriter ribbon..

I have often wondered how they manage to get return envelopes which miss, by one-quarter of an inch, fitting the blank you are supposed to return. Th….

I don't trust a bank that would lend money to such a poor risk..

I suppose that one of the psychological principles of advertising is to so hammer the name of your product into the mind of the timid buyer that when….

Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afraid of.