Explore Quotes by Wilson Mizner

Art is science made clear.

It is not in life, but in art that self-fulfillment is to be found.

A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.

You sparkle with larceny.

Most hard-boiled people are half-baked.

Life's a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest.

Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it in time.

Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor-unassisted.

A fellow who is always declaring that he's no fool, usually has his suspicions.

If you count all your assets you always show a profit.

The difference between chirping out of turn and a faux pas depends on what kind of a bar you're in.

Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.

I've had ample contact with lawyers, and I'm convinced that the only fortune they ever leave is their own.

I know of no sentence that can induce such immediate and brazen lying as the one that begins, 'Have you read - .'

I've spent several years in Hollywood, and I still think the movie heroes are in the audience.

The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock.

Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up.

The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.

Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton.

A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something.

I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.