At any age, we struggle with intimacy. When you're a kid, you think, 'I won't have that problem. I'll have sex whenever I want when I'm a grown-up!' And then, somehow, it doesn't quite turn out that way, and it's so surprising to people that connection remains so challenging even when you're married.
Interpretation
Intimacy can be challenging at any age, often surprising those who expect it to be easier in adulthood.
David Frankel highlights the misconceptions surrounding intimacy and connection, revealing that despite the belief that adult life will naturally resolve issues related to sexual and emotional relationships, many individuals still face significant challenges even within committed partnerships. This reflection underscores the complexity of human relationships and the continued struggle for intimacy throughout life.
In practice
In a seminar on relationships, this quote can illustrate common misconceptions about intimacy.
I get so sick and tired of hearing people gripe about what their parents did to them. You know what your parents did to you? The best thing they could do. The best thing they knew how, the only thing in many cases that they knew how. Nobody has set out maliciously to hurt their child, unless they were psychotic.
Where there is no love, a person's faithfulness to the marriage bond is probably against nature.
...available people are the ones who are dangerous, because they confront us with the possibility of real intimacy.
When I meet a woman who attracts me, I prefer women,' she said. 'And when I meet a man who attracts me, I prefer men.' 'You mean you haven't made up your mind yet.' 'I mean exactly what I said. I told you you wouldn't like it. Most people who ask want me definitely on one side or the other.
My brained warned me, but my heart didn't want to take its advice.
Forget sex or politics or religion, loneliness is the subject that clears out a room.
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