Good pain is pain in the service of a purpose. Bad pain is pain endured because we are resisting a needed growth step.
Henry CloudRead
When a child shuts down his painful emotional side, he also loses the ability to express his joyous side. Emotions are a whole. With anger comes the ability to express delight; with sadness comes the ability to express lightheartedness. This is the breadth of emotion that allows an adult to experience intimacy with a spouse, with God, and with his children
Interpretation
Suppressing painful emotions hinders the expression of joyful ones, impacting intimacy in relationships.
This quote emphasizes the interconnectedness of human emotions, suggesting that when an individual represses painful feelings, they simultaneously inhibit their capacity to experience joy. It illustrates how a full spectrum of emotions is essential for authentic connections with others, including romantic partners, family, and even a higher power, ultimately illustrating the importance of emotional vulnerability in fostering intimacy.
In practice
This quote can be shared during a workshop on emotional intelligence and its importance in relationships.
Good pain is pain in the service of a purpose. Bad pain is pain endured because we are resisting a needed growth step.
A good test of a relationship is how a person responds to the word 'no.' Love respects 'no,' control does not.
One of the first signs that you’re beginning to develop boundaries is a sense of resentment, frustration, or anger at the subtle and not-so-subtle violations in your life. Just as radar signals the approach of a foreign missile, your anger can alert you to boundary violations in your life.
The mature person meets the demands of life, while the immature person demands that life meet her demands.
Things don't change in a marriage until the spouse who is taking responsibility for a problem that is not hers decides to say or do something about it.
The twin sister to autonomy and freedom is responsibility and accountability. You cannot have one with out the other. If someone is given an area of responsibility, not only must they be set free to do it, they must also be held accountable for what they do. Accountability clarifies freedom. In the teams and companies where you see boundary confusion, power struggles, control, over-reaching of one's line of responsibility, you will also see lapses in accountability as well.
Whenever you tell a group of people that they can't use bathrooms, or they can't access spaces that other people use, that is dehumanizing. It is discriminatory, and it reinforces the stigma and the prejudices that the transgender community already faces.
I don't believe professional athletes should be role models. I believe parents should be role models.
Hug and kiss whoever helped get you - financially, mentally, morally, emotionally - to this day. Parents, mentors, friends, teachers. If you're too uptight to do that, at least do the old handshake thing, but I recommend a hug and a kiss. Don't let the sun go down without saying thank you to someone, and without admitting to yourself that absolutely no one gets this far alone.
You go into a room and you know where you're welcome; you know where you're unwelcome.Sometimes in a hostile situation you stick around because hostility itself is important.The people who are garrulous and wear their heart on their sleeve and tell you everything, that's one kind of person, but the fellow who's hiding behind a tree and hoping you don't see him is the fellow that you'd better find out why.
When it comes to our relationship with loneliness, specifically, it's important to understand how our relative introversion or extroversion informs our preference for social interaction.
Connection and love: We all want it. Most people settle for connection because love's too scary.
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