QuoteProject
My children cause me the most exquisite suffering of which I have any experience. It is the suffering of ambivalence: the murderous alternation between bitter resentment and raw-edged nerves, and blissful gratification and tenderness. Sometimes I seem to myself, in my feelings toward these tiny guiltless beings, a monster of selfishness and intolerance.
Adrienne Rich
ShareWTF𝕏

Interpretation

What this quote means

This quote expresses the complex and conflicting emotions a parent experiences regarding their children, encompassing both love and struggle.

Adrienne Rich reflects on the intense and often contradictory feelings that come with motherhood. The quote illustrates the dual nature of parental love, revealing how it can be accompanied by struggles with ambivalence, where moments of deep joy and gratitude coexist with feelings of frustration and resentment. This emotional complexity emphasizes the challenges inherent in nurturing children, highlighting how a parent's passionate feelings can oscillate between pride and distress, ultimately showcasing the depth of love intertwined with the burdens of responsibility.

Themes

ParenthoodEmotionsLoveSufferingAmbivalence

In practice

Example use cases

During a heartfelt conversation about parenting at a family gathering.

More from Adrienne Rich

The word revolution itself has become not only a dead relic of Leftism, but a key to the deadendedness of male politics: the revolution of a wheel which returns in the end to the same place; the revolving door of a politics which has liberated women only to use them, and only within the limits of male tolerance.
Adrienne RichRead
A president cannot meaningfully honor certain token artists while the people at large are so dishonored.'”
Adrienne RichRead
There is no 'the truth','a truth' - truth is not one thing, or even a system. It is an increasing complexity. the pattern of the carpet is a surface. When we look closely, or when we become weavers, we learn of the tiny multiple threads unseen in the overall pattern, the knots on the underside of the carpet
Adrienne RichRead
It is the suffering of ambivalence: the murderous alternation between bitter resentment and raw-edged nerves, and blissful gratification and tenderness
Adrienne RichRead
It's as if, in the mother's eyes, her smile, her stroking touch, the child first reads the message:'You are there!'
Adrienne RichRead
Pride is a tricky, glorious, double-edged feeling.
Adrienne RichRead

Similar quotes

Lord, this humble house we'd keep Sweet with play and calm with sleep. Help us so that we may give Beauty to the lives we live. Let Thy love and let Thy grace Shine upon our dwelling place.
Edgar GuestRead
I shall never forget my mother, for it was she who planted and nurtured the first seeds of good within me. She opened my heart to the lasting impressions of nature; she awakened my understanding and extended my horizon and her percepts exerted an everlasting influence upon the course of my life.
Immanuel KantRead
No work-family balance will ever fully take hold if the social conditions that might make it possible - men who are willing to share parenting and housework, communities that value work in the home as highly as work on the job, and policymakers and elected officials who are prepared to demand family-friendly reforms - remain out of reach.
Arlie Russell HochschildRead
A family can develop only with a loving woman as its center.
Karl Wilhelm Friedrich SchlegelRead
Luckily, my father and my mother liked us to talk, so they encouraged us to talk, so that the girls in my house, they're all very powerful speakers and powerful agents of their own will, as is my brother.
Ntozake ShangeRead
My own eight children all march to the beat of their inner music, and in some cases, it is definitely far away from what I hear. I've had to honor their instincts and their choices, and merely guided them out of harm's way until they could be their own guides.
Wayne DyerRead

A little wisdom, now and then

Subscribe for the occasional hand-picked quote. No noise.

Quote by Adrienne Rich | QuoteProject