It's not the child's responsibility to teach the parent who they are. It's the parent's responsibility to learn who the child is.
Interpretation
Parents should take the initiative to understand their children's identities instead of expecting children to guide them.
This quote emphasizes the crucial role of parents in the development and understanding of their children. It suggests that the responsibility lies with the parents to actively engage in learning about their child's personality, interests, and identity, rather than expecting the child to communicate or teach them about themselves.
In practice
In a parenting seminar discussing the importance of understanding children's behavior.
I get kind of, um, bored by all the sexuality and gender labels because I feel like that's where the problem comes in, when people feel that they need to have these particular identities. If you didn't have these labels, and you just acted on how you genuinely felt at any point, then you wouldn't have anything to contend with.
People write me every day. It feels like this cycle that keeps giving, because as far along as I get in my happiness and success, hearing other people's stories is a constant reminder of where I came from, where people are, and how much help everybody still needs.
It's important that when you do standup, you do small places like coffee shops and also big places like colleges. It helps you find the little nuances in your set that don't work, and you can shave off the excess.
When you first start out in stand-up and, probably, as any performer, you enjoy the attention so much, and even though that hasn't died down on stage, it certainly has satiated whatever was in me that was needing that much attention. When I'm off stage, it's not something that I really need.
Before I had a double mastectomy, I was already pretty flat-chested, and I made so many jokes over the years about how small my chest was that I started to think that maybe my boobs overheard me... and were just like, 'You know what? We're sick of this. Let's kill her.'
People have responded to my stories so well. They come up after a show and say things like, 'Your album really helped me,' or 'I have stage four cancer. I'm terminally ill.' Somebody told me it gave them the courage to die.
I wish all the mothers, fathers and children out there realize how much I need them and how much I value their support.
I am most anxious to give my own children enough love and understanding so that they won't grow up with an aching void in them--like you and I and Harold and Martha. That can never be filled, and one goes around all one's life trying, trying to make up for what one didn't get that was one's birthright, asking the wrong people for it.
I had a wonderful father, and I couldn't bear that television virtually ignored black fathers.
Kids are born into the situation they're born into, and obviously, they have no control over that. And we, as adults, it's up to us to take care of kids - that's part of your moral responsibility. I always tell people, 'There's two groups we should take care of - old people and young people.'
All parents damage their children. It cannot be helped. Youth, like pristine glass, absorbs the prints of its handlers. Some parents smudge, others crack, a few shatter childhoods completely into jagged little pieces, beyond repair.
What is a family, after all, except memories? Haphazard and precious as the contents of a catch-all drawer in the kitchen.
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