Continental people have a sex life; the English have hot-water bottles.

- George Mikes

It was decided almost two hundred years ago that English should be the language spoken in the United States. It is not known, however, why this decis…

- George Mikes

The poor Americans are so busy defending the rights of Hindus in Pakistan, Moslems in India, Jews in Palestine, Koreans in Japan, Italians in Yugosla…

- George Mikes

The world still consists of two clearly divided groups: the English and the foreigners. One group consists of less than 50 million people; the other …

- George Mikes

You can keep a dog: but it is the cat who keeps people, because cats find humans useful domestic animals.

- George Mikes

Was he joking? Was he being sarcastic? Aggressive? Impertinent? Or just courteous? There was no telling from his impassive face. What a country, he t…

- George Mikes

An Englishman, even if he is alone, forms an orderly queue of one.

- George Mikes

Many Continentals think life is a game; the English think cricket is a game.

- George Mikes

THE British are brave people. They can face anything, except reality.

- George Mikes