I felt like we had stories about family loyalty; I didn't feel like we had stories about what to do when you felt that loyalty to your family was in conflict with loyalty to yourself.
In families like mine, there is no crime worse than telling the truth.
Interpretation
What this quote means
The quote highlights the taboo of honesty within certain families, where truth can lead to severe repercussions.
Tara Westover's quote reflects a powerful sentiment about familial dynamics, suggesting that in her family, expressing the truth is seen as a betrayal or a crime. This statement speaks to the complexities of relationships within families that operate on unspoken rules, where maintaining certain narratives or protecting the family's reputation is prioritized over honesty. It reveals the tensions that can arise when individual perspectives clash with collective family expectations.
Themes
In practice
Example use cases
In a discussion about the importance of family dynamics in therapy groups.
More from Tara Westover
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We think love is noble, and in some ways, it is. But in some ways, it isn't. Love is just love. And sometimes people do terrible things because of it.
I was 17 the first time I set foot in a classroom, but 10 years later, I would graduate from Cambridge with a Ph.D. 'Educated' is the story of how I came by my education. It is also the story of how I lost my family.
I think that when memoir goes wrong, it goes wrong from too much memory, too much detail. It's about clearing all that away and just getting to the story.
Although my family attended the same church as everyone in our town, our religion was not the same. I could stand with my family or with the gentiles... but there was no foothold in between.
Similar quotes
Parents, what are your children learning from your worship? Do they see the same excitement as when you go to a basketball game? Do they see you prepare for worship as you do for a vacation? Do they see you hungry to arrive, seeking the face of the Father? Or do they see you content to leave the way you came?.....They are watching. Believe me. They are watching.
I always wanted a father. Any kind. A strict one, a funny one, one who bought me pink dresses, one who wished I was a boy. One who traveled, one who never got up out of his Morris chair. Doctor, lawyer, Indian chief. I wanted shaving cream in the sink and whistling on the stairs. I wanted pants hung by their cuffs from a dresser drawer. I wanted change jingling in a pocket and the sound of ice cracking in a cocktail glass at five thirty. I wanted to hear my mother laugh behind a closed door.
More than ever before, there is a global understanding that long-term social, economic, and environmental development would be impossible without healthy families, communities, and countries
I think our family is like a lot of families. We had no vocabulary for mental illness
Of course I regret not having been able to spend time with my family.
I usually claim that pregnant women should not read books about pregnancy and birth. Their time is too precious. They should, rather, watch the moon and sing to their baby in the womb.