Life is a near-death experience.
George CarlinRead
To me, fast food is when a cheetah eats an antelope.
Interpretation
This quote humorously contrasts the idea of fast food with a natural predator-prey relationship.
George Carlin's quote uses humor to redefine the concept of fast food by comparing it to a cheetah, known for its speed, quickly catching and consuming its prey, the antelope. This playful take suggests that the term 'fast food' can be interpreted in a more literal and natural sense, illustrating the irony of how we use the term in modern society.
In practice
Using this quote during a stand-up comedy routine to illustrate absurdity in how we perceive fast food.
Life is a near-death experience.
Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car."
If you've got a cat and a leg, you've got a happy cat. If you've got a cat and two legs, you've got a party.
This is a lttle prayer dedicated to the separation of church and state. I guess if they are going to force those kids to pray in schools they might as well have a nice prayer like this: Our Father who art in heaven, and to the republic for which it stands, thy kingdom come, one nation indivisible as in heaven, give us this day as we forgive those who so proudly we hail. Crown thy good into temptation but deliver us from the twilight's last gleaming. Amen and Awomen.
Some people try to get out of jury duty by lying. You don't have to lie. Tell the judge the truth. Tell him you'd make a terrific juror because you can spot guilty people.
Intelligence tests are biased toward the literate.
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: we both were crazy about girls.
Luckily, a recent survey published in the American Sociological Review revealed that atheists are the least trusted group in America—less trusted, even, than homosexuals. It makes sense at least we trust the homosexuals with our hair.
I always wanted to be more of a person that people enjoy. Somebody that will make you laugh. I'm talking about just my personality, not necessarily how my music sounds.
A lot of sexism is just very silly... and the best response is laughter and ridicule.
There has been much tragedy in my life; at least half of it actually happened.
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