My first big mistake was made when, in a moment of weakness, I consented to learn the game; for a man who can frankly say "I do not play bridge" is allowed to go over in the corner and run the pianola by himself, while the poor neophyte, no matter how much he may protest that he isn't "at all a good player, in fact I'm perfectly rotten," is never believed, but dragged into a game where it is discovered, too late, that he spoke the truth.
My only solution for the problem of habitual accidents is to stay in bed all day. Even then, there is always the chance that you will fall out. - Robert Benchley
My only solution for the problem of habitual accidents is to stay in bed all day. Even then, there is always the chance that you will fall out.
- Robert Benchley
There may be said to be two classes of people in the world; those who constantly divide the people of the world into two classes and those who do not. - Robert Benchley
There may be said to be two classes of people in the world; those who constantly divide the people of the world into two classes and those who do not.
What is the disease which manifests itself in an inability to leave a party--any party at all--until it is all over and the lightsare being put out?.… - Robert Benchley
What is the disease which manifests itself in an inability to leave a party--any party at all--until it is all over and the lightsare being put out?.…
Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley
Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.
Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed be doing at that moment. - Robert Benchley
Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed be doing at that moment.
Who said time machines haven't been built yet? They already exist. They're called books - Robert Benchley
Who said time machines haven't been built yet? They already exist. They're called books
I once heard a woman laugh at that most tragic moment in all drama, the off-stage shot in "The Wild Duck," and I afterward had her killed, so there w… - Robert Benchley
I once heard a woman laugh at that most tragic moment in all drama, the off-stage shot in "The Wild Duck," and I afterward had her killed, so there w…
It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous. - Robert Benchley
It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.
I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well. - Robert Benchley
I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.
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