The first relative I came out to was my aunt Teri, a superior court judge in San Francisco. Her reaction surprised me. 'I've known you were gay for years,' she said. From that moment on I was comfortable in my own skin.
Interpretation
Coming out to someone can bring a sense of relief and acceptance, especially when the person has already recognized your true self.
In this quote, Jason Collins shares his experience of coming out to his aunt, a judge, who unexpectedly revealed that she had known about his sexual orientation for years. This moment of acceptance allowed him to embrace his identity confidently, highlighting the importance of supportive relationships in the journey of self-acceptance.
In practice
During an LGBTQ+ pride event, I shared this quote to emphasize the importance of familial acceptance.
I would love to see an athlete live their life in an authentic way, not feel that they have to hide, not feel that they have to be afraid, or live with shame - all the other things that go with being a closeted athlete. No human being should have to walk that path. But there is that fear of stepping forward.
The worst insult you can give a professional athlete is to call them soft. And the stereotype out there is that gay is soft.
For many young people growing up in minority communities, there is a sense that their lives are disposable. As athletes, we have a platform to let those kids know that their lives are important. That their lives matter to us.
Some people insist they've never met a gay person. But Three Degrees of Jason Collins dictates that no NBA player can claim that anymore. Pro basketball is a family. And pretty much every family I know has a brother, sister or cousin who's gay. In the brotherhood of the NBA, I just happen to be the one who's out.
My dream was to play in the NBA and live my authentic life as a proud gay man at the same time. I was able to accomplish both of those goals because of the people who have supported me throughout my life.
I didn't set out to be the first openly gay athlete playing in a major American team sport.
The loneliest you will get is in the most public of arenas: You will go to a place and end up in the smallest compartment possible, because it's a distraction to everybody, and you end up not getting to enjoy it like everyone else.
For an instant she felt them, their identities, almost their substance, pass over her head like a wave. At some time she would be — or no, already she was like that too; she was one of them, her body the same, identical, merged with that other flesh that choked the air in the flowered room with its sweet organic scent; she felt suffocated by this thick sargasso-sea of femininity.
...Nothing that your partner does is personal. Your partner is dealing with her own garbage. If you don't take it personally, it will be so easy for you to have a wonderful relationship with your partner
It wasn't that I forgot Hanna. But at a certain point the memory of her stopped accompanying me wherever I went. She stayed behind, the way a city stays behind as a train pulls out of the station. It's there, somewhere behind you, and you could go back and make sure of it. But why should you?
Discriminating against same-sex couples just isn't right.
Saying hello doesn't have an ROI. It's about building relationships.
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