Admit when you're wrong. Shut up when you're right.
John M. GottmanRead
In a good relationship, people get angry, but in a very different way. The Marriage Masters see a problem a bit like a soccer ball. They kick it around. It's 'our' problem.
Interpretation
In healthy relationships, conflicts are viewed as shared challenges rather than personal attacks.
This quote by John M. Gottman emphasizes the importance of collaboration and perspective in relationships. Rather than seeing conflicts as a negative experience, it suggests that couples who embrace healthy dynamics understand that challenges can be viewed as 'our' problems to solve together, much like a soccer ball that can be kicked around and discussed openly.
In practice
During a couple's therapy session discussing how they handle disagreements.
Admit when you're wrong. Shut up when you're right.
Marriages are much more likely to succeed when the couple experiences a 5 to 1 ratio of positive to negative interactions whereas when the ratio approaches 1 to 1, marriages are more likely to end in divorce.
Gay and lesbian relationships operate on essentially the same principles as heterosexual relationships
Too often, when transgender people die, family members or funeral homes will end up dressing a body of a transgender person in the garments of the gender that they were assigned at birth instead of their gender identity. They're often dead-named and misgendered.
For a girl, appearance can be a powerful form of oppression. No matter how intelligent a girl may be, no matter her many talents, these attributes are not easily discerned. Brains and talent will never stand up against a girl who is clearly physically attractive.
All of my peers died of AIDS, and I have no one to celebrate my past or my journey, or to help me pass down stories to the next generation. We lost an entire generation of storytellers with HIV.
Because immigrants have always been particularly prone to repetition - it's something to do with that experience of moving from West to East or East to West or from island to island. Even when you arrive, you're still going back and forth; your children are going round and round. There's no proper term for it - original sin seems too harsh; maybe original trauma would be better.
Find the right people, not the best people.
Men and women aren't the same. And they won't be the same. That doesn't mean that they can't be treated fairly.
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