Admit when you're wrong. Shut up when you're right.
John M. GottmanRead
In a good relationship, people get angry, but in a very different way. The Marriage Masters see a problem a bit like a soccer ball. They kick it around. It's 'our' problem.
Interpretation
In healthy relationships, conflicts are viewed as shared challenges rather than personal attacks.
This quote by John M. Gottman emphasizes the importance of collaboration and perspective in relationships. Rather than seeing conflicts as a negative experience, it suggests that couples who embrace healthy dynamics understand that challenges can be viewed as 'our' problems to solve together, much like a soccer ball that can be kicked around and discussed openly.
In practice
During a couple's therapy session discussing how they handle disagreements.
Admit when you're wrong. Shut up when you're right.
Marriages are much more likely to succeed when the couple experiences a 5 to 1 ratio of positive to negative interactions whereas when the ratio approaches 1 to 1, marriages are more likely to end in divorce.
Gay and lesbian relationships operate on essentially the same principles as heterosexual relationships
There’s no black male my age, who’s a professional, who hasn’t come out of a restaurant and is waiting for their car and somebody didn’t hand them their car keys.
It was a strange thing, to still be in love with your wife and to not know if you liked her. What would happen when this was all over? Could you forgive someone if she hurt you and the people you love, if she truly believed she was only trying to help? I had filed for divorce, but that wasn't what I really wanted. What I really wanted was for all of us to go back two years, and start over. Had I ever really told her that?
Access to public facilities like bathrooms is important for transgender people. But the fight for transgender rights does not begin and end at the bathroom door.
One theory says that if you treat people well, you're more likely to encourage them to do what you want, making all the effort pay off. Do this, get that. Another one, which I prefer, is that you might consider treating people with kindness merely because you can. _x000D_ _x000D_ Regardless of what they choose to do in response, this is what you choose to do. Because you can.
They were governed by private loyalties which they did not question. What mattered were individual relationships, and a completely helpless gesture, an embrace, a tear, a word spoken to a dying man, could have value in itself
Real intimacy is only possible to the degree that we can be honest about what we are doing and feeling.
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