Admit when you're wrong. Shut up when you're right.
John M. GottmanRead
In a good relationship, people get angry, but in a very different way. The Marriage Masters see a problem a bit like a soccer ball. They kick it around. It's 'our' problem.
Interpretation
What this quote means
In healthy relationships, conflicts are viewed as shared challenges rather than personal attacks.
This quote by John M. Gottman emphasizes the importance of collaboration and perspective in relationships. Rather than seeing conflicts as a negative experience, it suggests that couples who embrace healthy dynamics understand that challenges can be viewed as 'our' problems to solve together, much like a soccer ball that can be kicked around and discussed openly.
Themes
RelationshipConflictCollaborationCommunicationPartnership
In practice
Example use cases
During a couple's therapy session discussing how they handle disagreements.
More from John M. Gottman
All quotes →Marriages are much more likely to succeed when the couple experiences a 5 to 1 ratio of positive to negative interactions whereas when the ratio approaches 1 to 1, marriages are more likely to end in divorce.
John M. GottmanRead
Gay and lesbian relationships operate on essentially the same principles as heterosexual relationships
John M. GottmanRead
Similar quotes
Marriage is one long conversation, chequered by disputes.
Robert Louis StevensonRead
Brothers don't necessarily have to say anything to each other - they can sit in a room and be together and just be completely comfortable with each other.
Leonardo DicaprioRead
One good husband is worth two good wives, for the scarcer things are, the more they are valued.
Benjamin FranklinRead
If you want others to like you, if you want to develop real friendships, if you want to help others at the same time as you help yourself, keep this principle in mind: Become genuinely interested in other people.
Dale CarnegieRead
A quarrelsome man has no good neighbours.
Benjamin FranklinRead
Loneliness is like starvation: you don't realize how hungry you are until you begin to eat.
Joyce Carol OatesRead