Instead of saving for someone else's college education, I'm currently saving for a luxury retirement community replete with golf carts and handsome young male nurses who love butterscotch.
In terms of what happened to Amy [Schumer], if that happened to me I would be like, "Yes, please leave." But I toured a lot. I started as an opening … - Jen Kirkman
In terms of what happened to Amy [Schumer], if that happened to me I would be like, "Yes, please leave." But I toured a lot. I started as an opening …
- Jen Kirkman
People said to me, "You know, when you record a special, you're going to regret it. The one thing you'll regret because you're a comic is you'll thin… - Jen Kirkman
People said to me, "You know, when you record a special, you're going to regret it. The one thing you'll regret because you're a comic is you'll thin…
Testosterone makes you completely out of control, but that's okay. - Jen Kirkman
Testosterone makes you completely out of control, but that's okay.
There have been many times in my life where I got opportunities that I never thought would be the things that I needed, so I'm always saying, "I want… - Jen Kirkman
There have been many times in my life where I got opportunities that I never thought would be the things that I needed, so I'm always saying, "I want…
I realized I need a certain kind of chemistry and a certain kind of look to be into someone, and like 1 percent of the population has it. - Jen Kirkman
I realized I need a certain kind of chemistry and a certain kind of look to be into someone, and like 1 percent of the population has it.
[Yoga] never calms me. Ever. But it certainly helps me prevent something. - Jen Kirkman
[Yoga] never calms me. Ever. But it certainly helps me prevent something.
I'm tired of explaining to Hollywood that people would laugh at me, because I go around America making them laugh every week. Nobody would be offende… - Jen Kirkman
I'm tired of explaining to Hollywood that people would laugh at me, because I go around America making them laugh every week. Nobody would be offende…
Let's say I was like, "I'm going to write a book this year," which I'm not. Let's just say that was it. Then it would be for the joy of writing it. I… - Jen Kirkman
Let's say I was like, "I'm going to write a book this year," which I'm not. Let's just say that was it. Then it would be for the joy of writing it. I…
I always try to be open to whatever the universe wants from me. - Jen Kirkman
I always try to be open to whatever the universe wants from me.
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