Juliet's version of cleanliness was next to godliness, which was to say it was erratic, past all understanding and was seldom seen.
Interpretation
This quote humorously critiques the notion of cleanliness, suggesting that it is often unpredictable and rarely achieved.
Terry Pratchett's quote plays on the familiar saying 'cleanliness is next to godliness' by presenting Juliet's interpretation of cleanliness as chaotic and elusive. The humor lies in the irony that something as generally revered as cleanliness can be described in such an erratic and almost absurd manner, highlighting human imperfections and the humorous side of our expectations.
In practice
In a light-hearted speech about personal hygiene, you could quote this to illustrate that perfection is hard to attain.
And then Jack chopped down what was the world's last beanstalk, adding murder and ecological terrorism to the theft, enticement, and trespass charges already mentioned, and all the giant's children didn't have a daddy anymore. But he got away with it and lived happily ever after, without so much as a guilty twinge about what he had done...which proves that you can be excused for just about anything if you are a hero, because no one asks inconvenient questions.
They've got something they do it with, I think it's called a mocracy, and it means everyone in the whole country can say who the new Tyrant is. One man ... one vet. ... Everyone has ... the vet. Except for women, of course. And children. And criminals. And slaves. And stupid people. And people of foreign extraction. And people disapproved of for, er, various reasons. And lots of other people. But everyone apart from them. It's a very enlightened civilization.
Geography is just physics slowed down, with a couple of trees stuck in it.
You can't trample infidels when you're a tortoise. I mean, all you could do is give them a meaningful look.
Any fool could be a witch with a runic knife, but it took skill to be one with an apple corer.
People look down on stuff like geography and meteorology, and not only because they're standing on one and being soaked by the other. They don't look quite like real science. But geography is only physics slowed down and with a few trees stuck on it, and meteorology is full of excitingly fashionable chaos and complexity. And summer isn't a time. It's a place as well. Summer is a moving creature and likes to go south for the winter.
That's the kind of ad I like, facts, facts, facts.
Comedy is a tool of togetherness. It's a way of putting your arm around someone, pointing at something, and saying, 'Isn't it funny that we do that?' It's a way of reaching out.
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
There are many times when a woman will ask another girl friend how she likes her new hat. She will reply, 'Fine,' but slap her hand to her forehead the minute the girl leaves to yipe, 'What a horror!'
God bless our good and gracious King, Whose promise none relies on; Who never said a foolish thing, Nor ever did a wise one.
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