I don't know why small chocolates are called fun-sized; I mean, if I called a midget fun-sized, they'd kick off.
Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight. - Karl Pilkington
Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight.
- Karl Pilkington
It's weird how me and that insect are miles apart in terms of lifestyle, yet we both like a biscuit. - Karl Pilkington
It's weird how me and that insect are miles apart in terms of lifestyle, yet we both like a biscuit.
Pigeons: They've got wings, but they walk a lot. - Karl Pilkington
Pigeons: They've got wings, but they walk a lot.
If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good - Karl Pilkington
If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good
People who live in a glass house have to answer the door. - Karl Pilkington
People who live in a glass house have to answer the door.
I find that if you just talk, your mouth comes up with stuff. - Karl Pilkington
I find that if you just talk, your mouth comes up with stuff.
If you had five photos of anuses, I could not point mine out. - Karl Pilkington
If you had five photos of anuses, I could not point mine out.
If you don't have a plan, you can end up doing some interesting things. - Karl Pilkington
If you don't have a plan, you can end up doing some interesting things.
I saw a bee have a heart attack. - Karl Pilkington
I saw a bee have a heart attack.
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