Self-consciousness is the destroyer of erotic joy.
Interpretation
Self-awareness can inhibit the pleasure and spontaneity in intimate experiences.
In this quote, Ian McEwan suggests that being overly aware of oneself can undermine the enjoyment of erotic experiences. It highlights how self-consciousness can create barriers to intimacy and open expression of feelings, leading to a loss of genuine connection and joy in romantic encounters.
In practice
During a discussion about relationships, one might say, 'As Ian McEwan pointed out, self-consciousness is the destroyer of erotic joy.'
Watching him during the first several minutes of his delivery, Cecilia felt a pleasant sinking sensation in her stomach as she contemplated how deliciously self-destructive it would be, almost erotic, to be married to a man so nearly handsome, so hugely rich, so unfathomably stupid. He would fill her with his big-faced children, all of them loud, boneheaded boys with a passion for guns and football and aeroplanes.
My needs were simple I didn't bother much with themes or felicitous phrases and skipped fine descriptions of weather, landscapes and interiors. I wanted characters I could believe in, and I wanted to be made curious about what was to happen to them. Generally, I preferred people to be falling in and out of love, but I didn't mind so much if they tried their hand at something else. It was vulgar to want it, but I liked someone to say 'Marry me' by the end.
It marked the beginning and, of course, an end. At that moment a chapter, no, a whole stage of my closed. Had I known, and had there been a spare second or two, I might have allowed myself a little nostalgia.
There are ways in which art can have a longer reach than politics.
And now she was back in the world, not one she could make, but the one that had made her, and she felt herself shrinking under the early evening sky. She was weary of being outdoors, but she was not ready to go in. Was that really all there was in life, indoors or out? Wasn't there somewhere else for people to go?
Imagining what it is like to be someone other than yourself is at the core of our humanity. It is the essence of compassion, and it is the beginning of morality.
To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.
No rival will steal away my sure love; that glory will be my gray hair.
Create a world, your world. Alone. Stand alone. And then love will come to you, then it comes to you.
What I noticed, though, is almost every time I type the word love, it gets changed to the word live… I learned that fully loving and fully living are not only synonymous but the kind of life that Jesus invited us to be part of.
The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
I pretended indifference…even in the presence of love, in the presence of hunger. And the more deeply I felt, the less able I was to respond.
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