I should have my own show by now. Yeah. How many damn sitcoms does Kelsey Grammer need? How many more stupid Housewives do they need throwing tables and limbs at each other. Yeah, I guess I need to take off my artificial leg and throw it at Vanderpump. I like doing live shows - it's just getting to them that's a hassle.Doing films is fun too ... a good film ... but there's a lot of waiting around.
You can't get a body like mine in a bottle unless you push real hard. - Judy Tenuta
You can't get a body like mine in a bottle unless you push real hard.
- Judy Tenuta
How many of you have ever started dating because you were too lazy to commit a suicide? - Judy Tenuta
How many of you have ever started dating because you were too lazy to commit a suicide?
What do men want? Men want a mattress that cooks. - Judy Tenuta
What do men want? Men want a mattress that cooks.
My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate. I said, "Just wait." - Judy Tenuta
My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate. I said, "Just wait."
Friends are just enemies who don't have enough guts to kill you. - Judy Tenuta
Friends are just enemies who don't have enough guts to kill you.
I turned down a date once because I was looking for someone a little closer to the top of the food chain. - Judy Tenuta
I turned down a date once because I was looking for someone a little closer to the top of the food chain.
I got an A in philosophy because I proved my professor didn't exist. - Judy Tenuta
I got an A in philosophy because I proved my professor didn't exist.
I should have my own show by now. Yeah. How many damn sitcoms does Kelsey Grammer need? How many more stupid Housewives do they need throwing tables … - Judy Tenuta
I should have my own show by now. Yeah. How many damn sitcoms does Kelsey Grammer need? How many more stupid Housewives do they need throwing tables …
I'm half-Italian and half-Polish. So I'm always putting a hit out on myself. - Judy Tenuta
I'm half-Italian and half-Polish. So I'm always putting a hit out on myself.
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