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If someone irritates you, it is only your own response that is irritating you. Therefore, when anyone seems to be provoking you, remember that it is only your judgment of the incident that provokes you. -
Epictetus
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Interpretation

What this quote means

Our responses to irritations are often the source of our irritation, not the actions of others.

Epictetus, a Stoic philosopher, emphasizes that external events are not inherently irritating; rather, it is our subjective judgments and reactions that lead to our feelings of irritation. This perspective encourages self-reflection, suggesting that individuals have the power to change their responses to situations and, in turn, their emotional experiences.

Themes

IrritationResponseJudgmentStoicismSelf-ControlPhilosophy

In practice

Example use cases

In a therapy session discussing personal reactions to stress.

More from Epictetus

Crows pick out the eyes of the dead, when the dead have no longer need of them; but flatterers mar the soul of the living, and her eyes they blind.
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Learn to distinguish what you can and can't control. Within our control are our own opinions, aspirations, desires and the things that repel us. They are directly subject to our influence.
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Men are disturbed not by the things that happen, but by their opinion of the things that happen.
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Nothing truly stops you. Nothing truly holds you back. For your own will is always within your control. Sickness may challenge your body. But are you merely your body? Lameness may impede your legs. But you are not merely your legs. Your will is bigger than your legs. Your will needn't be affected by an incident unless you let it.
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The people have a right to the truth as they have a right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
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Practice yourself, for heaven's sake, in little things, and thence proceed to greater.
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