I do what I do because I love it.

- Ray Romano

That's when you know you're a true married couple: when you have to apologize for what you did in her dream.

- Ray Romano

Whenever I get down about life going by too quickly, what helps me is a little mantra that I repeat to myself: at least I'm not a fruit fly.

- Ray Romano

I married a saint - well, a saint who curses.

- Ray Romano

I do still get intimidated by certain things.

- Ray Romano

I'll be spending the holidays with my family. Nothing special, just some light bickering and biting sarcasm.

- Ray Romano

Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up.

- Ray Romano

The more I go through parenting, the more I say I owe my mother an apology.

- Ray Romano

For the sake of your marriage, get a king-size bed. And if you really want to stay married, get two.

- Ray Romano