The time has come to tell the truth. Again. There is no love without justice. Men and women who cannot be just deny themselves and everyone they choose to be intimate with the freedom to know mutual love. If we remain unable to imagine a world where love can be recognized as a unifying principle that can lead us to seek and use power wisely, then we will remain wedded to a culture of domination that requires us to choose power over love.
Interpretation
Love is intertwined with justice, and true intimacy cannot exist in a context of injustice.
In this quote, Bell Hooks emphasizes the essential connection between love and justice, arguing that genuine love cannot flourish in an atmosphere of inequality and oppression. She stresses the importance of recognizing love as a force for unity and empowerment, warning that without acknowledging this link, society risks perpetuating systems of domination that prioritize power over genuine human connection.
In practice
In a speech about social justice, you might use this quote to highlight the need for equality in relationships.
Privilege is not in and of itself bad; what matters is what we do with privilege. I want to live in a world where all women have access to education, and all women can earn PhD’s, if they so desire. Privilege does not have to be negative, but we have to share our resources and take direction about how to use our privilege in ways that empower those who lack it.
Self-love is the foundation of our loving practice. Without it our other efforts to love fail. Giving ourselves love we provide our inner being with the opportunity to have the unconditional love we may have always longed to receive from someone else.
While privacy strengthens all our bonds, secrecy weakens and damages connection. Lerner points out that we do not usually "know the emotional costs of keeping a secret" until the truth is disclosed. Usually, secrecy involves lying. And lying is always the setting for potential betrayal and violation of trust.
When we only name the problem, when we state complaint without a constructive focus or resolution, we take hope away. In this way critique can become merely an expression of profound cynicism, which then works to sustain dominator culture.
Once you do away with the idea of people as fixed, static entities, then you see that people can change, and there is hope.
I still think it's important for people to have a sharp, ongoing critique of marriage in patriarchal society — because once you marry within a society that remains patriarchal, no matter how alternative you want to be within your unit, there is still a culture outside you that will impose many, many values on you whether you want them to or not.
I shudder at the thought of men.... I'm due to fall in love again
We don't need to justify love; it is there or not there. Real love is accepting other people the way they are without trying to change them.
Of the love or hatred God has for the English, I know nothing, but I do know that they will all be thrown out of France, except those who die there.
You don't love someone because they're perfect," she says. "You love them in spite of the fact that they're not." I don't know how to respond to that; it's like being told after thirty-five years that the sky, which I've seen as a brilliant blue, is in fact rather green.
A lot of people are living with mental illness around them. Either you love one or you are one.
Bereavement is a universal and integral part of our experience of love.
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