If I had my way, any man guilty of golf would be ineligible for any office of trust in the United States.
Interpretation
The quote humorously suggests that playing golf is a disqualifying trait for holding a position of trust.
H. L. Mencken's quote reflects a satirical view on golf and its players, implying that engaging in the sport indicates a lack of seriousness or integrity. This statement can be seen as a humorous critique of both the game of golf and the people who are involved in it, suggesting that those found guilty of playing it should not be entrusted with public responsibilities.
In practice
In a casual conversation about sports, you could use this quote to spark a debate on the moral integrity of athletes.
I know a good many men of great learning-that is, men born with an extraordinary eagerness and capacity to acquire knowledge. One and all, they tell me that they can't recall learning anything of any value in school. All that schoolmasters managed to accomplish with them was to test and determine the amount of knowledge that they had already acquired independently-and not infrequently the determination was made clumsily and inaccurately.
It takes a long while for a naturally trustful person to reconcile himself to the idea that after all God will not help him
It is the theory of all modern civilized governments that they protect and foster the liberty of the citizen; it is the practice of all of them to limit its exercise, and sometimes very narrowly.
The central belief of every moron is that he is the victim of a mysterious conspiracy against his common rights and true deserts.
The cure for the evils of democracy is more democracy.
It is my conviction that no normal man ever fell in love, within the ordinary meaning of the term, after the age of thirty.
It was a confusion of ideas between him and one of the lions he was hunting in Kenya that had caused A. B. Spottsworth to make the obituary column. He thought the lion was dead, and the lion thought it wasn't.
If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.
And off we go, out onto the highway looking for a little fun. Perhaps a flatbed truck loaded with human cadavers will explode in front of a Star Trek reunion. One can only dream and hope.
Quickly, bring me a beaker of wine, so that I may wet my mind and say something clever.
The English are busy folk; they have no time in which to be polite.
Just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon doesn't mean we all have.
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