Quotes on Funny Marriage Advice

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.

Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.

Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.

Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it.

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.