Revolution, n. In politics, an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment..

FICKLENESS, n. The iterated satiety of an enterprising affection..

OSTRICH, n. A large bird to which (for its sins, doubtless) nature has denied that hinder toe . . . . The absence of a good working pair of wings is ….

Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having..

The liberality of one who has much, in permitting one who has nothing to get all that he can..

A king's staff of office, the sign and symbol of his authority. It was originally a mace with which the sovereign admonished his jester and vetoed mi….

History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools..

WASHINGTONIAN, n. A Potomac tribesman who exchanged the privilege of governing himself for the advantage of good government. In justice to him it sho….

The covers of this book are too far apart..

Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease….

alone, adj. In bad company..

PERFECTION, n. An imaginary state of quality distinguished from the actual by an element known as excellence; an attribute of the critic. The editor ….

Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Misses (Mrs.) and Mister (Mr.) are the three most di….

Bigamy, n. A mistake in taste for which the wisdom of the future will adjudge a punishment called trigamy..

LOSS, n. Privation of that which we had, or had not. Thus, in the latter sense, it is said of a defeated candidate that he "lost his election"..

Patriotism: The first resort of a scoundrel..

In forgiving an injury be somewhat ceremonious, lest your magnanimity be construed as indifference..

PROOF, n. Evidence having a shade more of plausibility than of unlikelihood. The testimony of two credible witnesses as opposed to that of only one..

Advice: The suggestions you give someone else which you hope will work for your benefit..

REPENTANCE, n. The faithful attendant and follower of Punishment. It is usually manifest in a degree of reformation that is not inconsistent with con….

I keep a conscience uncorrupted by religion, a judgment undimmed by politics and patriotism, a heart untainted by friendships and sentiments unsoured….