Wit - the salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out..

RASCALITY, n. Stupidity militant. The activity of a clouded intellect..

A miracle is an act or event out of the order of nature and unaccountable, as beating a normal hand of four kings and an ace with four aces and a kin….

YOUTH, n. The Period of Possibility, when Archimedes finds a fulcrum, Cassandra has a following and seven cities compete for the honor of endowing a ….

PRESENTABLE, adj. Hideously appareled after the manner of the time and place..

DUEL, n. A formal ceremony preliminary to reconciliation of two enemies. Great skill is necessary to its satisfactory observance; if awkwardly perfor….

Duty - that which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire..

TRUST, n. In American politics, a large corporation composed in greater part of thrifty working men, widows of small means, orphans in the care of gu….

Compromise, n. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction of thinking he has got what he ought not to have,….

Scribbler, n. A professional writer whose views are antagonistic to one's own..

OUT-OF-DOORS, n. That part of one's environment upon which no government has been able to collect taxes. Chiefly useful to inspire poets..

An aged Burgundy runs with a beardless Port. I cherish the fancy that Port speaks sentences of wisdom, Burgundy sings the inspired Ode..

HOG, n. A bird remarkable for the catholicity of its appetite and serving to illustrate that of ours. Among the Mahometans and Jews, the hog is not i….

OBSTINATE, adj. Inaccessible to the truth as it is manifest in the splendor and stress of our advocacy..

Gout, a physician's name for the rheumatism of a rich patient.

POSITIVISM- A philosophy that denies our knowledge of the Real and affirms our ignorance of the Apparent. Its longest exponent is Comte, its broadest….

Liberty is one of the imagination's most precious possessions..

The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff..

Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel..

To those who view the voyage of life from the port of departure the bark that has accomplished any considerable distance appears already in close app….

MULTITUDE, n. A crowd; the source of political wisdom and virtue. In a republic, the object of the statesman's adoration..