Explore Quotes by Bill Watterson

You know, maybe we don't need enemies." "Yeah, best friends aree about all I can take.

Once it's too late, you appreciate what a miracle life is.

Hobbes: What are you doing? Calvin: Being "cool." Hobbes: You look more like you're being bored. Calvin: The world bores you when you're cool. Hobbes: Look, I brought a sombrero! Now we can both be "cool." Calvin: A sombrero?! Are you crazy?! Cool people don't wear sombreros! Hobbes: What fun is it being cool if you can't wear a sombrero?

Of course, REAL zombies never get the giggles when they look at each other.

Barney's Dad was really bad so Barney hatched a plan when his dad said "Eat your peas." Barney shouted no and ran Barney tricked his mean old dad and locked him in the cellar Barney's Mom never found out where he'd gone, Cause Barney didn't tell her. There his dad spent his life eating mice and gruel With every bite for fifty years he was sorry he'd been cruel

Calvin: Somewhere in Communist Russia, I'll bet there's a little boy who has never known anything but censorship and oppression. But maybe he's heard of America, and he dreams of living in this land of freedom and opportunity! Someday, I'd like to meet that little boy... and tell him the awful TRUTH ABOUT THIS PLACE!! Calvin's Dad: Calvin, be quiet and eat the stupid Lima beans.

Even when you look for it, you're never prepared for it.

As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever. You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.

Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.

People always make the mistake of thinking art is created for them. But really, art is a private language for sophisticates to congratulate themselves on their superiority to the rest of the world. As my artist’s statement explains, my work is utterly incomprehensible and is therefore full of deep significance.

Van Gogh would’ve sold more than one painting if he’d put tigers in them.

A day can really slip by when you're deliberately avoiding what you're supposed to do.

I'm a man of few words." "If you read more, you might have a larger vocabulary.

Calvin: They say the world is a stage. But obviously the play is unrehearsed and everybody is ad-libbing his lines. Hobbes: Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce. Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.

I hope some historian will confirm that I was the first cartoonist to use the word 'booger' in a newspaper comic strip.

Virtual reality has nothing on Calvin.

The way Calvin's brain is wired, you can almost hear the fuses blowing.

I say if a novelty Christmas song is funny one time, then it is funny every time. - Calvin

Blustery cold days should be spend propped up in bed with a mug of hot chocolate and a pile of comic books.

Calvin the zombie searches for food. Horribly, the undead feed upon the living! ...Although, in a pinch, a PBJ will do, if you eat it messily enough.

It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw.