Stop saying you're not racist because you have a friend that's black. That's like saying you're not a pedophile because you have a friend that's a ki….

Sometimes, when I'm feeling down because nothing seems to be going right, I like to take a home pregnancy test. Then I can say, 'Hey, at least I'm no….

I dated a teacher in high school. Yeah, it didn't make me cooler. And a lot of you are like 'that's cause you were homeschooled'..

The day I notice a cyclist obey a stop sign is the day I'll stop enjoying watching them bounce off my hood..