Mel Gibson is losing it. I don't know how people still supporting this dude's movies like it's all good. That dude is nuts. All you gotta do is shut ….

I don't consider myself a stand-up comedian. I consider myself a performer; a comic as opposed to stand-up comedian. Stand-up comedians stand there a….

Being a parent is about your survival. Surviving the terrible two's is the most important thing. Kids get heavy. Quite literally. They're heavy to li….

Let me tell about Tennessee. If your car breaks down in Tennessee, you have just moved to Tennessee..

I'll drive down the street, and I'll practice improv. I will sit there at a red light and see two guys talking to each other, and I will just start p….

Sometimes you got to put somebody in their place, let them know that you mean business and you're a grown ass man..

Sad when you spend more time trying to stay alive than living..

I most resemble Benjamin Button. I evolve. I attach myself to the heartbeat of whatever is going on at that particular time, or I just chart a new pa….

Remember Tupperware? That was the toughest stuff ever. Why can't they make a phone out of Tupperware?.

I tell people all the time, as I was going through my process of being a comedian or being an actor and a writer at SNL, I tell people that everythin….

I’m trying to be the Jay-Z of comedy one day. I don’t know if there’s any comedy moguls out there, but I would love to be the first comedy mogul..

I don't like to dabble in anything I don't do well. I don't talk politics..

Comedians are therapists. People honestly think we're doing it for ourselves. No. If we wanted to do stand-up for ourselves, we would perform in fron….

A lot of comedians are selfish..

There's book smart, there is street smart, there's relationship smart, there's too many different kinds of smarts to know all of them. Everybody does….

I never write jokes, I just try to make myself laugh..

You can wait for things to happen for you or you can make things happen for you..

Improv relies just as much on listening as it does you delivering dialogue. That's the hard for some people. Some people just concentrate on what the….

I may even show up behind the camera. I love to put things together; I love to give direction. I have a great eye for pace..

Keep it real by being straight forward. Don't pull no punches on people. It's better to tell somebody than just lollygag around, letting them think t….

Just broke up with somebody. Well, it wasn't really a break up, it was a booty call I might have took too serious..