Explore Quotes by Johnny Vegas

They look outside the windows of their apartment in town and realize they're not living in a terrace anymore. This is a room full of dreamers who like to go to London for a day.

There's lots of stuff about me being a fan of Cliff but not being gay. Which suggests that he is, but he's not. Anyway, this is Channel 4, let their lawyers sort it out.

I used to be good with kids, but as I get older, I'm grumpy and terrible with them. As for doing a gig at a 6-year old's birthday party, you couldn't pay me enough.

We had a week off in the middle of shooting, but as soon as everyone stopped, we all went down with six different types of flu and other unmentionable diseases.

The cheese board is my big treat at Christmas that I have to deny myself during the rest of year.

I think it sort of dawns on you that if you're not gigging constantly you're not actually relevant. You may be relevant to a different part of the media now, to television commissioners and editors, but to a young live-comedy audience you're not, really.

I also want to return to doing stand-up. I've become frightened of live audiences. This is a really telling sign that I need to go back on the comedy circuit again.

I came back from university thinking I knew all about politics and racism, not knowing my dad had been one of the youngest-serving Labour councillors in the town and had refused to work in South Africa years ago because of the situation there. And he's never mentioned it - you just find out. That's a real man to me. A sleeping lion.

You know, there's that temptation in interviews to make yourself sound - well, to give yourself a bit of mystery.

My first holiday to San Francisco in 1998-99 was supposed to be a two-week vacation but I ended up staying five weeks and nearly didn't come home.

If an original piece of wardrobe came up from Star Wars, I'd probably spend a lot of money on it.

My forte is playing drunks down the ages. When my agent rings me about a role, I don't ask what the part is, but what century it's in.

With stand-up you've just got that one chance. Audiences can be quite fickle.

You don't want to be flattered and become big-headed by getting awards. But, well, I am.

Never try to be witty with U.S. airport officials. It's always lost on them and you'll find yourself being put back on the plane.

You can sway an audience if you win the women over. The gentlemen will follow 'cause they can be so foolish like that at times, they are easily led.

My agent once said, 'You're not very driven.' And it's true. I'm not the type to ring up and go, 'Get me this part!'

I've always been looking for other people's approval.

I've got little ankles and a bit of a belly, so it makes me look rather an egg on legs.

I'm getting positive feedback for my acting so we'll see if any other interesting parts come up.

I've got my finger in a lot of pies.